The fabled Austin music festival kicks off March 17, 2010, and already the showcasing bands number in the millions! From Argentina to New Zealand, from Aa to Zona Tango, Advance Cassette will sniff out every gumsmacking, bootlicking badass and newborn band on the planet and report back here. Or not.COO: United States, Austin
REVUED: Akina Adderley & The Vintage Playboys (Get Level Records – 2009) Wah-wah, porn guitar, Blood, Sweat, & Tears horns, and boogie-blues vocals make for a run of the mill soul jam throw down.
SHOULD YOU: Naaah.
07 Advance Cassette: SXSW 2010
WHO: AkashA
COO: Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
REVUED: Into … AkashA (AkashA – 2009) Seven-piece “world” outfit tries every musical style under the sun, and sometimes it works. For example, “Ants In My Turban” is basically “The Devil Went Down to Georgia” with a reoccurring sitar break. Their hand drum epic “Kunna Kool” is crazy cool.
SHOULD YOU: Why not, especially if you’re into sitar -- lots and lots of sitar.
WHO: Alberta Cross
COO: USA, Brooklyn
REVUED: Broken Side Of Time (ATO/Red -- 2009) Primitive guitar anthems with a pointed nod toward J Mascis. Lead vocals rummage around in the Wayne Coyne toolbox before coming out half Kevin Kinney. MMJ might sound like this if they suddenly grew a pair of giant, angry balls.
SHOULD YOU: Yes. DO NOT MISS.
WHO: Allo Darlin
COO: London, United Kingdom
REVUED: The Polaroid Song (Fortuna Pop Records – 2009) Bouncy, whimsical, sunshiney all the time! Even when there’s no accordion, everything somehow sounds like a bright sunshiney accordion. Can’t imagine a melancholy moment even if they play for days on end. The lo-fi approach does help to temper the whimsy a bit
SHOULD YOU: Yep!
WHO: Alvarez Kings
COO: United Kingdom, South Yorkshire
REVUED: You Me Them Us (Unsigned) Franz Ferdinand is soo double naught… Yet guitar dance-pop will never die. It’s not that these guys suck; I simply question the authenticity of their sneer.
SHOULD YOU: Doesn’t matter; some one will force you. And you will like it.
WHO: Lesser Gonzalez Alvarez
COO: United States, Baltimore
REVUED: Why Is Bear Billowing? (Carpark Records – 2008) While it’s true that Jack Johnson single-handedly wrecked the “guitar on the beach” genre, Lesser Gonzalez Alvarez is doing his part to put it right again. This Havana-born troubadour goes cerebral with a quiet confidence, sunset poetry, and gorgeous acoustic guitar.
SHOULD YOU: Yes, if you want him to sail away with your girlfriend.
WHO: An Experiment On A Bird In The Air Pump
COO: United Kingdom, London
REVUED: These Sins EP (Trouble Records – 2008) Uni-dimensional, punk trio dripping with militant feminism. If you’re not a fan already, chances are you never will be.
SHOULD YOU: Strictly as an experiment.
WHO: An Horse
COO: Australia, Brisbane
REVUED: Rearrange Beds (Mom And Pop/Valve – 2009) Bang-and-jangle duo not afraid of a little 20th Century retread. In an era of indie rock smoke-and-mirrors, it’s refreshing to hear something direct: snarling guitar, thundering drums, and vocals with presence. Get this record and learn all the words so you can wig out properly when the time comes.
SHOULD YOU: YES!
14 Advance Cassette: SXSW 2010
WHO: The Anix
COO: United States, Los Angeles
REVUED: Demolition City (Chamberlain Records – 2008) Stunningly awful, alternative radio schlock. The kind of stuff that begins with a lengthy discussion about a “target audience.”
SHOULD YOU: Nope.
15 Advance Cassette: SXSW 2010
WHO: Anti Pop Consortium
COO: United States, New York
REVUED: Florescent Black (Big Dada – 2009) A. Hip-Hop has failed to live up to its potential. B. Less Jay-Z, more Anti Pop Consortium. With Mr. Roboto backing tracks and lyrics that shun brand specific consumer goods, hope springs eternal. These guys manage 18 tracks with nary a “yeeah” or “uh-hu.” I had a hard time picking just one.
SHOULD YOU: Yeeeah, boy. Expand your horizons.
16 Advance Cassette: SXSW 2010
WHO: Apoptygma Berzerk
COO: Norway, Fredrikstad
REVUED: Rocket Science (Harddrive – 2009) IDM! Okay! I can listen, admire the effort, and never feel less than complete if I never hear a single note of it again. What does that say about IDM? What does that say about me?
SHOULD YOU: Sorry, no. You go ahead. It’s just that I’ve been drinking Bloody Marys since sun-up and the pot isn’t helping-- Oh, wait, I like this one. Is this “Green Queen?”
17 Advance Cassette: SXSW 2010
WHO: Apostle Of Hustle
COO: Canada, Toronto
REVUED: Eats Darkness (Arts & Crafts – 2009) Yawn. Pointless guitar pop with pointless amphetamine rhythms. Note: pointless noise drops and found sounds will not enhance a wide stance.
SHOULD YOU: Nuh-uh.
WHO: Arborea
COO: United States, Maine
REVUED: House Of Sticks (Borne Recordings – 2009) Hill-people instrumentation and slithering vocal takes make for a newish compendium of folk dalliances. A bit too self-concerned for yours truly, but I can see other folks liking it.
SHOULD YOU: If you should happen by along your journey to the Renaissance fair, sure!
WHO: Bomani Armah
COO: United States, Washington DC
REVUED: The Hustle/Shake It Off (Park Triangle – 2006) The only thing worse than Christian Rock is Jesus-Hop: a horrible genre, begging Streetcred AND Hitmaker simultaneously. WS Burroughs once said, “If you are doing business with a religious son-of-a-bitch, get it in writing. His word isn’t worth shit; not with The Good Lord telling him how to fuck you on the deal.”
SHOULD YOU: Yes, if you like preachy, disingenuous, bullshit with your beats. Actually, I’m so put off by Bomani that I’ve decided to sub out his Advance Cassette spot with The Disposable Heroes Of Hiphoprisy, Featuring William S. Burroughs. The cut is “Words Of Advice For Young People,” and it features the above quoted gem, among others.
20 Advance Cassette: SXSW 2010
WHO: Olof Arnalds
COO: Iceland
REVUED: Vid Og Vid (One Little Indian – 2010) Seriously? I don’t get the buzz on this one. Sigur Ros? Is that it? Some one in that band had something to do with Arnalds’ record? That’s it? Don’t get me wrong; I love her acoustic finger picking, but that Julie Andrews cum Judy Collins vocal is like a blowtorch up a cat’s ass.
SHOULD YOU: Enjoy your scenester party. You can wipe the blood from your ears with a page or two from Paste. (Is that still a print deal, or did they go all digital?)
WHO: Art vs. Science
COO: Australia, New South Wales
REVUED: Friend In The Field (MySpace – 2010) Chunky synths with a dance beat. Vaguely fun and completely forgettable.
SHOULD YOU: Nope.
WHO: ASG
COO: United States, Wilmington
REVUED: Win Us Over (Volcom Entertainment – 2007) Heavy metal nonsense… Wait, is that redundant. If you said no, then ASG might be the band for you. Nicely executed, then again, I don’t get out much.
SHOULD YOU: I wouldn’t, but you, well you… you headbanger, you.
WHO: A Shorline Dream
COO: United States, Denver
REVUED: Recollections Of Memory (Latenight Weeknight Records – 2009) Terrible, washed out, cascading crap. “Hey, look! If I keep doing the same thing, then it repeats… Like…like, uhm… like recollections of memory.”
SHOULD YOU: Under no circumstances.
WHO: Astra
COO: United States, San Diego
REVUED: The Weirding (Rise Above Records – 2009) These D&D masters deliver The Epic 70s in magical increments of 8 minutes, 10, 11, 15, and a whopping 17 plus – all on a single album. Lest you doubt their sincerity, consider the fact that every last note was penned in charcoal, on sheepskin, in a cave lit exclusively by candles rendered from the fat of wooly mammoths. Also, there was a wizard.
SHOULD YOU: Go ahead; check out a song or two. Chances are that’ll be the whole fairy-shagging set.
WHO: A Sunny Day In Glasgow
COO: United States, Philadelphia
REVUED: Ashes Grammar (Mis Ojos Discos – 2009) No context, no intrigue, and no taste. Ladies and gentlemen, the Self Esteem Movement has taken the stage! Please give this sextet a trophy for full frontal drooling, a blue ribbon for showing up, and your warmest applause for their vulgar self-indulgence.
SHOULD YOU: No.
WHO: Atash
COO: United States, Austin
REVUED: Global Harmony (Live) (World Harmony – 2007) The sitar (along with its unnamed cousins) is relegated to the far reaches of the orchestra pit in this international ensemble. The guitar brings a warmer tone to the traditional Middle Eastern melody, and a classical western arrangement melds with Persian themes to create a full and less grating listening session in the often-ambivalent genre of so-called World Music.
SHOULD YOU: Yes. This is good food for the head as well as the soul.
WHO: Athena
COO: United States, Unknown
REVUED: As far as I know, there are: one white Athena, two black Athenas, and one or two Hispanic Athenas. The white Athena sings gospel music. One of the Hispanic Athenas sings gospel as well. While another dresses in a Wonder Woman costume and sings sex music.
SHOULD YOU: I don’t know! (You got me requisitioned, Blondie.)
WHO: Nicole Atkins And The Black Sea
COO: United States, Neptune City
REVUED: Neptune City (Columbia – 2009) Wriggling somewhere betwixt Queen and Abba, the Jersey girl manages the major label well with her Broadway pipes, yet something is lacking. Perhaps she’s working on that right now, getting ready to spring it on unassuming patrons at the Austin Music Festival.
SHOULD YOU: Why not? Especially if you are interested in a possible, new something.
WHO: Attack Attack!
COO: United States, Westerville
REVUED: Someday Came Suddenly (Rise Records/Victory – 2009) Screamcore trash. No, no, no, no, no, no, nononononono noooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Ahhhhrrrgh! Do they let eleven-year-olds in the South X West?
SHOULD YOU: Jesus Christ.
WHO: Attack! Attack!
COO: United Kingdom, Caerphilly
REVUED: Attack! Attack! UK (Rock Ridge Music – 2008) I know (!) it’s like a nightmare on a loop, only British! See, one has two exclamation points, and the other only takes one. At least these guys are fit for twelve-year-olds.
SHOULD YOU: Shit. Really?
WHO: At Versaris
COO: Spain, Barcelona
REVUED: A Cada Passa (Propaganda pel Fet! – 2009) Tough-ass, rapin’, man-bitches with a hatred for…get ready…wait for it…here it comes… FASCISM! And? And? And what else? CAPITALISM! Now that’s some cutting edge shit, rite der, booy, yup. Truth is, some of they beats is fly, but I’m a mother fucking capitalist, yo. Word.
SHOULD YOU: I would, ‘cause I ain’t a-scared-a no commie.








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